it's like everything I expected to see tonight all put together in one at once
that is the greatest description ever
I literally made his dick bleed. How the fuck do you think it went?
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
We eventually had to ration the melon vodka. 10 pushups per shot. THATS why my arms hurt
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
Sorry I pissed in your closet and lied to your parents that it was probably a flood. He got up to go to the bathroom, expecting sex when he got back, I panicked
We need to leave a grand offering for the god of free booze and salvia.
Thank you for trusting your ovaries to me
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
Hillary said in her victory speech "We're gonna come together". I've got a lib-boner.
Nothing says "i love you" more than flowers and potatoes
he force fed me pizza, ripped my clothes off, almost broke the couch, and actually broke my nose. it was a good night, i'd say 😂
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
In order to get rid of my bladder infections I must give up caffeine, nicotine and tight pants. It's like my pussy is an angry dictator or something
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