I got wasted for the 1st time and I sat in a fridge for 2 hours and a trash can?
Dude just fell down the stars trying to leave class early, the prof just looks down at him and says"thats what you get"
good news. it is gonna rain tomorrow so now I don't have to pay to clean the puke off the side of your car.
You are missing out on the best boobs in town right now
Was this before, or after you took my brand new bag of shredded cheese, and "Made it rain"?
I think I just agreed to be an escort for an Asian guy who's gonna be in the city next weekend before he moves back to Shanghai...
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
Good. We don't answer calls at dick thirty.
stalking the twitter feeds of girls who have fucked my current fuck buddy makes me glad we use condoms
Guess what I signed up for?!?!?!
Please tell me you're not selling your eggs.
Hi I am too sober and out of rum. Translation: I owe you some beer. Also, get better taste in beer.
Dude I turned down free booze. I think I'm growing as a person.
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
Randomize
