Swine flu. Run for my life!
went out last night and woke up on the bathroom floor again, thinking about just moving my bed in there.
i just got drunk dialed and its 10am. clearly finals are over.
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
Can someone please explain where the fish in the mason jar came from when we were at a bar all night?
You told the bartender if he gave you one of the fish you'd go away
I told him the only reason I'd sleep with him is if we have a threesome because I'll need moral support
Blacked out drunk in California and woke up somewhere in Arizona, I'm pretty sure I got here on foot
Let's put a bunch of beers in a backpack and shotgun them in a Red Lobster bathroom
I don't know how to reply to him. 'I'm glad the ecstasy my friend tricked you into taking wore off'...? It just doesn't seem sincere
Sorry for trying to wake you up by slapping your ass with a fruit 2 go.
I need to align my fucking chakras
Well I thought I saw everything and then I saw Christmas themed poop bags at Petco.
Lesson Learned: It's not a party until someone pisses their pants.
just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation
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