somebody snuck up and got me drunk
Only a mothe r could love this liver
I feel like this whole "telling that guy i have a kid to avoid him" thing is getting out of hand..
How so?
Probably at the point when i told him i was "Too drunk to drive" and "had to pick up my kid" all in a span of like 2 hours.
So this shipmate of mine somehow managed to throw up in his back pocket.
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
oh and if she happens to say anything about a cantalope and tissues... just go with it
Were betting on little kids falling and racing for a drinking game at the wedding.
I'm going to look like a jackass in the Mexican newspaper tomorrow.
"too many" and "free shots" never belong in the same sentence
She's licking the whiskey out of the carpet. I think we may be soulmates.
I think "we've never met sober" is a great relationship to have with someone
Just bought a colored water bottle so my classmates can be so judgemental when I bring beer to class.
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
Randomize
