I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
my vag is singing 'hurts so good' by john mellencamp
Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
I'm talking like I woke up and her bra was spinning around caught on my ceiling fan
I should have some sort of frequent buyer card or something. I just bought my third bottle of Captain this week. It's Wednesday.
Can't show you right now as we are in public and he refuses to let me photograph his penis in a bar.
I took the chef home. His dick even tasted like garlic
This girl did not understand, once police sirens go on, road-head needs to STOP
He was uncircumcised
It was like inception. A penis within a penis within a penis
It's all fun and games until your AARP eligible neighbors end up blacking out in your yard at 5pm with a box of franzia. I'm feeling a great year ahead
HE WAS DRESSED LIKE A FISHERMAN AND HE WAS LIKE OH SHIT I THINK I JUST FOUND THE DEADLIEST CATCH i couldnt not go for it my honour compelled me
ok give me a pep talk, I want a hotdog but I'm too stoned to go make it
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
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