why doesnt he love me? i have tried everything. i even sang to him after sex.
you have got to be kidding?
sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
Pretty girls always come out on top. Or bottom. Whatever. Point is we come out with their boyfriends.
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
I seriously just caught my 15 year old little sister with a positive pregnancy test coming out of the bathroom. Honest to God.
I have a coat hanger and a baseball bat. Her choice.
i don't know where i am. i made bad decisions. i think this guy is dead.
tried doing a cartwheel after 10 beers. Guess who has a dislocated shoulder.
Drunk me spoon fed everyone baby food last night.
DOGS JUST TOTALLY ATE THE FEATHERS OFF MY NIPPLE CLAMPS!!!
My sober self will be embarrassed tomorrow. For now I am laughing my ass off.
I'm two shots in and wandering around Barnes and Noble with $58 in singles.
I now have a other guy willing to drive 3 hours for my vagina. At my next gyno appointment I'm asking her if there's cocaine in there.
Wanna bang and Pregame work? I know you're the manager just promise to not fire me
She was on top, but I lost her at "alright, you look like predator."
Randomize
