4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
If that ambulance is off to save our dignity, please tell them it's too late...
im never drinking wine from a person in a wet suit and goggles ever again.
His search history includes homemade sex toys and a plunger. I'm scared about what goes on in their place.
Omg. I have a story to tell you later about that girl that just crawled on stage
Because everyone is allowed one half drunken 7:30 am walk back to campus in a cowgirl costume, right?
And then my hands went numb and no one believed me so I started putting peoples cigarettes out on them. Shitty idea i'll tell you that much
There is naked swordfighting and something green and alcoholic going on in the basement. COME. OVER. NOW.
Today was my cousin's Kindergarten graduation. I happen to also think of it as a MILF convention.
Sushi was just eaten off my naked body. I feel like I can die in peace now.
i got home safe but then alex started a fire so now we're at the hospital
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
Randomize
