I will show your tits more attention than Michael Jackson's death.
even my worst enemy doesn't deserve a bush like that
so I told him I hadn't been laid since Bush was president. Right after he cums, he says "Welcome to the Obama Administration".
He was singing Justin Beiber while we did it. I love secure Spanish men
We mailed him an 18 inch double headed dildo for his birthday. The Fedex guys certainly got a laugh out of it.
Getting a blow job while breaking up with my gf helps cope with the pain... Kinda weird her best friend is giving me the BJ
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
If there was a category for "most likely to end up a serial killer" in your high school yearbook then I'm sure you would have won it
I don't think it's ever a good night if I'm this hung over and I didn't even get an orgasm out of the deal...
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?
fucked him on the porch to avoid the chanting that always happens when we leave the bedroom. backfired when a group of freshman walked by and started screaming like fucking babies.
I woke up naked with a Jason mask on and a fat lip. What happened last night?
I swear he is my soulmate. He kept feeding me goldfish while we were fucking. Who wouldn't enjoy that while having sex.
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