i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
Drinking wine. Reading twilight. On a Friday night. Biggest loser contest. First Place.
Just bought plan B with a coupon. Told the pharmacist I like to keep it classy.
Every day you talk to me ... I literally love you more..
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
I'm pretty sure blacking out is a coping mechanism.
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
At front desk. Got a beer drinking pigeon.
Sorry we couldn't "turn off the mirrors." How're you feeling today?
He took the bartender's challenge and took a Jello shot with a tarantula frozen inside.
On the verge of sleeping with a man who can take me to an early bird dinner and a movie with his AARP discount. YOLO
My passport was stamped in Canada two weeks ago. One step closer to uncovering wtf happened that night
Having weed delivered to your door is like having your own personal Santa Claus
Baruch atah adonai DAT ASS DOE
I'll never lecture you, go get that dick baby girl make momma proud,I didn't raise no quitter
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