So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
so after morning sex, she rolled a joint and turned on sports center
you might have found the rare bro goddess. i thought they were myth
The cab driver just finished telling me how leaving community college after one month was the best desicion he ever made.
I drank mimosas and played bocce ball in the middle of finals week...now i know how Comm majors feel all the time.
Just had a flash back. Pretty sure i ate toilet paper last night.
just passed out again, this time at a subway. On a positive not they gave me a free sandwich, pretty sure out pity but at this point i don't care
To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.
there is a video of me on Facebook getting mad at a trash bin what the fuck was in your Pepsi
He held the kayak still so I wouldn't tip over while projectile vomiting. If that ain't true love, I don't know what is...
Maybe if I get to know him I'll stop wanting to fuck his wife so much.
My dad slapped my ass the other day and say I was "doing the family name good". I feel...proud
And on the first day of my adult job, I matched with one of my co workers on tinder...
He propositioned me for a threesome once so yeah I'd say he has what it takes to run for public office
I was just drinking but now I'm drinking and chasing with red bull. I call this "getting ready for work"
Aiming to get laid tonight but if it falls thru I'm either gonna make a mixtape for my sugar daddy or sew a teddy bear for his newborn
Randomize
