When she sits down, she uses her fat rolls like an arm rest.
Pls don't use the words alligator, purple, and sperm in the same sentence ever again.
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
You picked me up and threw me on a barstool and shoved shots in front of me.
Thats like the definition of a good friend
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
But I was triple fisting doubles, that's bound to be a good time. Might have a broken collarbone though.
The stripper just invited me to take shots with him out at his car after he gets off stage.. I mean why not? I've already seen everything he's got and it'll be easy to get him naked.
The US State Dept doesn't need to know I'm a high strung drunken whore.
The best part about being single is knowing how much everyone secretly creeps behind their gf/bfs back. You wouldn't believe..Have a great date night!
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
Thanks for the reference. If your boss hires me, I'll buy you a drink.
If my boss hires you, I'm going to need it.
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
had to remind myself that killing him is not a good career move AGAIN.
Unless my dick prospects improve this year’s Halloween costume will include panties with “DTF” written on them and a push up bra
Randomize
