we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
the worst part of it wasnt him peeing on the xbox. it was when he showed me his penis and made a kissy face at me. THAT was painful.
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
I was on hold waiting for customer service at verizon so we obviously we had enough time to have sex, i just put the phone on speaker
Just promise me you wont die... or hook up with an old asian lady playing slots
Cant promise that last part. I won't die though
Drinking Fireball means never having to say you're sorry. Unless its at you're arraignment.
Mike showed up naked and in handcuffs. Again. Feel free to come over and laugh because I'm not helping this time.
That's the kind of activity you can only get away with by wearing a lion codpiece
I could be busy drinking my face off and getting red white and bruised per usual
For the first time in my life, I still have money by the next payday. Who is this responsible person and what have they done with the real me?
Come over. We have half a bottle of jumbo champagne left and no boyfriends to slow us down
walked into my room this morning clutching two empty bottles of sminoff to find my roommate's ultra conservative parents staring at my posters of naked men. fuck parents weekend.
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
Julius Caesar had a huge penis
WTF are you reading?
Ha ha! No, the guy in the Caesar costume last night. We hooked up. His dick was huge
Everything is scary i hate being an adult i hate responsibility tell me a dick joke
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