I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
I think I have swimmer's ear. From his tongue.
saw a man at the beach in a red speedo. when he rolled over he unintentionally displayed a HUGE skid mark.
i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
Dude, everyone in your family has slept with that girl. Her vagina is like the Hindu version of a Bar Mitzvah.
i have my own cum on my nose right now. don't talk to me about "embarrassed".
We went into lab today and when no one was looking i touched our cadaver's penis!
I had to convince you not to write "happy birthday to the first guy who fingered me" on his facebook wall, right above the post from his current girlfriend's mother.
Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
Boxed wine mondays was one of our finer ideas
I'm sober enough to question why I have your name as "the wolverine" in my phone.
It was a two-sided wall so part of my body ended up in someone elses condo.
I woke up with masking tape on my nipples this morning........... WHY DO BAD THINGS HAPPEN TO GOOD PEOPLE
I've had your balls on my face a bunch of times so the least you could do is buy a girl some dinner.
You stumbled in the door as high as a kite, & ran into the table. I asked you if you were all right. You replied with "I don't have any soup."
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