Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
in spanish class. the girl next to me asked what Galapagos were. i told her they were islands. now she thinks Galapagos means islands in spanish
I'm making progress with her.. She actually looked at me today and gave me a dirty look. Things are going real good.
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
you know it's the perfect hook up when you don't have any friends in common with his girlfriend on facebook.
You can't just hum the Jaws theme song when you pull down my pants.
They were actually really boring considering how we met them.
howd you meet them?
They got shit-faced and decided to take a train to a city none of them had ever been to. We found them wandering the ghetto, with a bottle of gin and singing Disney songs.
Dude. Cab ride home consisted of me making out with an Asian girl sitting next to my Dad
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
Haha I haven't even had my interview yet and I'm already trying to fuck my way to the top. 'Merica.
He came in two seconds and stole my pizza so I'm not counting it.
It's Jesse McGoddamn Cartney, the whole world sings that shit
HE MIGHT HAVE YOUR BUTTHOLE, BUT HE CANT HAVE YOUR HEART. THATS MINE.
I hate when I wake up and find my vibrator next to me. Such a waste of an orgasm...getting myself off in my sleep and not remembering
if I hear Wonderful Christmastime one more time I'm putting my foot up Paul McCartney's ass.
Randomize
