Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
He practically bottle-fed me Jameson, like I was a baby chimpanzee on those nature specials.
Knitting and drinking wine. Forget my 21st birthday, might as well just skip to my 60th
Sorry I didn't take you making out with him all night as a hint you wanted nothing to do with him...
Hey, you remember years ago when you told me you would give me a kidney?
I was about to share my drunken story from the weekend, but two friends getting married and one finding out she's pregnant makes Saturday in jail look a little suspect.
Just smoked a joint with the hottest patient. God I love night shifts.
Human centipede...with the teletubbies. That's what my nightmare had in it.
I don't even want to know.
Remember that whole "don't let me drink" thing? We should really start sticking to that.
Sexiest use of a semi colon this week, congratulations.
Still, being medically ordered to stuff things in your vagina is amazing.
I'm covered in glow paint and shame. I'm never leaving this country
I lost my virginity to Adventure Time. DO YOU NOT UNDERSTAND THE SIGNIFICANCE?!
Want ramen today?
I need a salad
SALAD DOESNT WARM YOUR HEART AND BELLY
Randomize