is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
let's put it this way: i'm gonna stop drinking and get a gym membership. she's that hot
it's 8 a.m. and there are people having sex at the foot of the strangers bed i'm in. the guy just asked the girl how she lost her baby weight so fast.
We found her on the trampoline. She told us she was jumping so she could puke & rally. I think I want to marry her.
We tried to break her futon, I crushed my balls instead. You have one less reason to be jealous that my balls are insanely huge and yours are not.
Dude, I had to stop mid fuck. Her cat was swatting at my balls as I did her from behind. I couldve lost something.
She sucks. And I almost hooked up with a clown last night
I ordered a VEGAN pizza, because it gets here the fastest, just so I could get a 2 litre of Coke. For my whiskey.
Robert just walked in drunk, grabbed my Jameson from me, told me to let him do his thing, and spilled it all over the coffee table. Then he told me to grab a funnel because he was going home.
Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups.
What do I do with all this pork broth? I can't waste it.
CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG
I managed to break 3 nails and loose my stockings, but I made 87 dollars at the strip club. I asked where I could find an application on the way out.
...this is why fuck buddies should be only for grownups.
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
So were driving two hours to go to a club and Charles packed me a sippy cup full of tequila. He thinks of everything!
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