Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
last night I thought his shirt said yale... but this morning it definitely says old navy.
I cut my penus on the lid.
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
I love her to death but its like you have to do 5 lines of coke to be on her level.
She is screaming bc she thinks you jumped out the window...please show her you just went out for a smoke
Don't feel sorry for me. I'm getting Red Lobster and sex tonight. Nothing can bring me too far down.
Yeah. I mean it wasn't that awkward. I just made conversation like there was absolutely no lack of pants.
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
Nothing says "class act" like eating acid in the middle of a Buffalo Wild Wings
this is the last time i am going to a 7am booty call
What is more embarrassing, shitting yourself in Mexico or having sex in a forest preserve with a 19 yr old? This is crucial research.
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
This is a life or shit situation. Grab me toilet paper asap. This bathroom is fucking out. This is not a test. This an actual emergency and I am not joking.
Opening my shipments of mascara and nipple pasties this morning like a boss bitch
Randomize
