You just made me feel so damn special
I'd wear matching sweaters with you
i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
You should have seen her outfit yesterday. It was like pretty woman before Richard Gere gave her money to buy a new outfit.
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
How many times can you lose to your mom in beer pong before you can no longer show your face around campus?
We're smoking a joint the size of the average penis right now. I may not survive.
Did I change midway through last night?
Seven times. The most notable outfits were UFC Fighter and Top Hat Viking
That freshman kid successfully snuck into a college party, got caught, proceeded to jump out of a second story window without getting a scratch then met up with us a block away and somehow managed to get a bottle of grey goose in the meantime. He is truly blessed by the alcohol gods
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
like, by the end of my shift people were asking if I'd sobered up enough to take a drink order yet. that bad.
I knew it was you who came home last night because no one else would walk in at 3 am and start microwaving a burrito
I text the word "masturbation" so much, all it only takes my iPhone to auto-spell it is for me to type "mas".
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
we went to the skate park then back to her house for dinner, and somehow that ended with her making me blueberry pancakes at 2am
Randomize
