You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
I can't finish this paper in my room because every time I get distracted I start masterbating. I think it's time to go to the library...
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
I woke up with my keys safelty pinned to my thong. It's gonna be a great day.
he called me back to his office so he could lick a line of pixie stick off of my thigh
be sure to add "office slut" to your resume
Don't be alarmed at the girl laying on your bathroom floor.
You know that joke about taking tylenol pm and jerking off? you don't always win. sometimes you wake up in the morning naked lubed up cock in hand to the realator and would be perspective buyers laughing at you
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
Everyone is speaking Spanish and this 300 hundred pound chick is talking about the time she got out of prison... Fuck this place
Every now and then I'll meet one who is talented in the art of shower gymnast.
All I know is if i get a free preview weekend of HBO then I am recording Kindergarten Cop.
Never do acid then ask for a blow job while watching 28 Days Later. Heed my advice.
I dunno that I'd be trusting enough of junkyard tequila to drink it.
We're so high we're eating flavored lube.
Randomize
