I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
Pick my eyebrow is burning. I'm sitting in the back of dolows vat and listening to jolly music and wilfgang is signing and looking food. Cute kid. Home is where I go now.
what. the. fuck.
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
he's legally blind and likes the sound of my voice, good enough for me.
can we meet up so i can piece together the end of my night? for instance, did i jump or fall into a plant?
It was awful until we put her on a word ration. And she rationed her words accordingly. I love blondes.
I sent her 8 pictures of my dick in a baked potato. Not sure how I thought that would get me laid later.
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
on the subway to an interview & there's a dude doing whippits out of a cheese wil can
I want a burrito.
Truly, you are the voice of a generation.
Well, for starters, she called the condom a "dick mask."
I am not saying having unprotected sex in my boss' pool was a good idea, I am just saying it wasn't my worst idea of the summer.
Poking every semi-decent guy on Facebook in the hopes that one of them will want to hook up with me tonight. So far all i've accomplished is 5 new poke wars which i will most certainly continue after this weekend.
I actually feel bad for him. He has me as a girlfriend and he's like a saintly cleanly person... And I'm over here telling him to jizz on my back and shit.
It was probably the most embarrassing moment of my life. But I had cleavage, so I'm good!
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