It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
Tried to buy Xanax from my boss last night. Wrong Mike.
my roommate left her license, credit card, and cellphone on her desk. I feel like this is a trap.
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
Doing lines off a plate that says, "things go better with coke."
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
She kept pulling joints out of her bra and asking strangers for birthday hugs.
if i ever get hit by a car or something and become paralyzed promise me youll still be here to hand feed me shots and light my bowls please
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
I just threw in a dip with a guy that superglued his fake tooth back in today. My life is complete.
They said you bought the guy a shot and was talking about being Greek and then all of the sudden just puked all in their pitcher of beer and got kicked out of the bar.
I need to pull it together. I just cried my eyes out to Master Chef Junior.
Adulthood is punching a guy in the face when you find out he's trying to fuck you and he's married instead of fucking him regardless and believing anything he says
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
Randomize
