i couldnt tell she was wearing a bumpit until she started giving me head
Ask him about the girl he took home Saturday night. I swear she voted for Kennedy.
Smoked a joint and chugged some pepto. Feeling a lil better... Not sure which is working..... Gonna keep doing both.....
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
All I know is that I'm not gonna send out SOS messages via twitter for your rescue this time.
Hey man, sorry about punching you in the face, also about turning the shower on you. I just really wanted you to drink some water.
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
I have visions of guys in cheetah costumes with suits over it pissing on a children how are you
I went on an adventure and now we have more food.
Well, really we just have fire sauce and cookies. But they're edible.
Official reason: I couldn't get time off. The real reason: last Xmas nearly ended in alcohol poisoning to prevent me from screaming like a velociraptor
HIS DICK IS SO AWESOME DUDE. 15/10 SURPRISE
It's not my fault, Tequila turned all my alarms off.
Update: tequila girl had her hand down groomsmen pants
Get here now. There’s a guy dressed as Captain Morgan handing out miniature bottles of Captain Morgan.
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