I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
Im glad youre not pregnant with that New Jersey assholes baby. Your vagina would have smelled worse than Newark.
His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava
All I want for christmas is my sobriety back.
How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?!
She just looked at him and said "I'm gonna fuck that" and it totally worked.
This is your morning news. Today at 5 pm I will be going out of town until the 29th. If you would like some great sex before I leave, please contact me. The available packages are: a house call, an outdoor excursion, or a delivery style in-car quickie. available only while supplies last.
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
does the girl puking in my garbage belong to you?
he wouldn't lick chocolate syrup off of me because he's vegan. most awkward shower ever.
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
oh man that would be weird.. i feel like we should do dirty things before anything super intimate like a massage.
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
Do you remember when I didn't post that pic of you fucking an avocado on your boss' desk? Can you return the favour?
Randomize
