You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
I threw a jar of pickles out the window at a police car, why was that not a good enough reason to put me to bed?
Fuck men. I'm going to go eat a package of cookie dough and get fat. I hope I die of salmonella.
its not fair. if i was a guy, i'd be getting a high five for banging two in one night.
I apparently texted him "since you're taking time out to think about us. You probably need to think about me getting arrested right now."
You act like I'm the first person to try and hook up with a blind chick.
So should I finish watching Space Jam and then get head? Or get head while secretly watching Space Jam?
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
how much ball-pain constitutes an emergency?
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
So help my penis see only you. Give him some attention as well.
Leave it to me to sleep w a guy who gets poison ivy on his dick
Her parents are celebrating she found someone so well endowed.
Will there be champagne when they see the pay check?
Remember when we tried to have fun last time..? I got put in a choke hold and you woke up in some ones car.
He was so drunk we almost didn't even make it to his place because he didn't know where he lived
Randomize
