hotel room ftw
Nope it's him. He's whispering to himself and buying asparagus.
Have you ever chased with pilaf before? Because dont.
It wasn't random sex though, it was almost a relationship, built on lies and sex
did you dip my ponytail in franzia? its the only thing i can think of to explain my hair right now.
i draw the line when you ask for directions at a place you're already at.
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
The guy I woke up with is wearing the same nailpolish as me...I need to stop drinking
The Blue Grotto manager called. He asked me for your name and number. Apparently, on reviewing the videotape he noticed you consumed a whole pizza by yourself. He indicated that he has a tshirt for you and wants to put your picture on his eating wall of fame. Apparently, you are the first such person to complete this incredible feat of eating. Congratulations to you!! I am so proud.
I can't believe I came last night staring into my profile pictures eyes.
We might as well just set our livers out to sea on burning ships
When ur uncle gives you free weed, you take it
If we had a dog do you think we would be less hoe-y?
Nah
He unliked all of my pictures on instagram, I don't know whats worse, the fact that he did it or the fact that I noticed..
Also I've decided to start stealing shot glasses after I do the shots. You in?
Randomize
