He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
and thats how i got kicked in the balls by micky mouse
im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
so i just realized i am an alcoholic. I was making some tomato soup because im still sick, and put vodka in it. sad huh? lets go out!
I am going to get arrested. I am yelling fuck repeatedly, wearing a Bird jersey and polka dot pants while pounding wine. Amazing mug shot to follow.
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
super high. so of course there was a shoot out at the bank. there are 20 cop cars no lie. if i make it out of this i will never smoke again
Jesus christ how hard is BRING SNACKS AND DRUGS to interpret? I trust your judgement on this one.
And I just had to awkwardly tell 3 police officers that I was having sex and not in any trouble
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
He asked me what I wanted the cake to say and I then asked him if "I'm sorry for throwing up in your bed last night" was too long. He said it was...
Dedication to a hook up: I had to recruit five people at the train station to help me buy a ticket from a kiosk and get on the right train in 15 minutes because I discovered that my car was stolen.
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
I admit it could have gone better but look at it this way, since I broke the urn you don't have to worry about spreading the ashes.
Randomize