I found a dealer that takes plastic. I'm so in trouble.
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
That would warm my breasts.
In this context breast is a metaphor for soul.
she was literally 3 feet away from the garbage can, said she couldn't make it, and then proceeded to vomit on the floor in front of everyone in the restaurant
It's ok, I like adventure. Just ask my vagina.
Asking the homeless man what buss shelter is the warmest was not a good idea
Get in your clown car, pick up everyone you know, and head to the park. drunk Sledding grand prix tonight. winner takes home the leftover beer
i was giving head the other day and thought of your all penis tastes the same quote and couldnt stop laughing
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
Do you want the fat one with an ok face or the skinny ugly one?
It doesn't matter as long as our shame is in tandem.
You are the funniest drunk Jew I know. Never in my life have I witnessed someone respond, "Is your dick kosher?" while being picked-up on.
The drive thru lady at McDonald's asked how I was and I responded by opening the car door and throwing up all over the drive thru lane. Happy Sunday.
Randomize
