Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
All I remember was the chick screaming "don't hookup with him! His dick's the size of a cucumber"
She somehow inhaled a tack last night, she's having surgery today.
Lesbian sex in an alleyway drunk.
So I'm seriously not complaining - but I just fell ass backwards into a Tuesday night threesome. Sober
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
The waitress just told me I'm asking alot. So far I've asked for a soul, an angel and carbombs
You cant come. You're a Colorado native who drinks Bud over Coors. Fucking homegrown terrorist.
You showed them your nipple for dollars for the jukebox. You were depressed because only one of your songs played. Oh then you twisted your ankle and blamed it on your mad stripper skills.
No shame in my game.
Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back
I lost all of my bathing suit tops.. This is both a success and a failure
I slapped him but he didn't wake up. He just nuzzled my head, hugged me closer, and smiled.
It is clearly not my fault that you decided studying was more important than trying to bang our hot teacher for an A, so I seized the opportunity.
She gave me a roadie as we drove home from fireworks. People were still lighting off their displays as we drove by. I love America.
girls shouldnt black out with american flag bandaids on their nips
Randomize
