I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
just left the emergency room. condom extraction.
She calls me Shortcake and bites my ear. Trust me, I'm FINE with bein the secret lesbian lover.
He said he had a problem he needed to take care of before we got omelets and then showed me his erection.
I love our strategizing... I wish we used the same passion for planning our lives and future that we use for planning our drunken escapades... We would both be doctors by now, I swear
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
Unfortunately hes not a hipster douchebag with no life goals, so naturally I'm not interested.
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
Her family was right next to mine during christmas eve mass. Between the terrifying glares and her trying to set my sleeve on fire during the candle part I am VERY sure she knows im fucking her ex...
I mean I kinda plunged vagina first into my last relationship
I should have bailed a long time ago. I mean, he has a bible verse-a-day app next to his dick pics in his phone.
I made him laugh his dick is mine
They had like literally all the dildos. It looked like a seance for dick. I left the apartment and haven't been back.
Randomize
