you better believe me or I'll punch you in the face
So I don't have any furniture but we just skateboard drunk around the floor.
I had to go to the bank to confirm purchases made on 10/31/09 because they were signed as Lady Gaga
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
Your TV has the DVD menu for White Chicks permanently burned into the screen. I can't anymore. That's just a whole different level that I cannot comprehend.
remember last night when you and I took turns yelling THIS IS HUGE in my dogs faces? I love wine night.
Just found my mom passed out in my bed holding a bag of wine. Not sure if I'm ashamed or proud.
Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first
Do you remember Kelly my alter personality? She talked like a man and would sing amazing grace?
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
Yeah. It's a great diet plan tho. Just have sex every time you get hungry.
to instagram or to not instagram the picture i took of when i shit in the urinal
Dude we both faced 40s of steel reserve which is like saying, "Hey, I'm a complete piece of shit!"
Woke up in a sombrero and a males speedo. Tequila makes normal peoples clothes fall off, however it makes me fall into a questionable identity crisis
Also topless tea is a thing that happens in our apartment. Ready yourself.
Randomize
