Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
after the first, "yea you like that baby", i quickly remembered why i had stopped having sex with him.
Why do you keep getting laid in MY dreams
Thanks for last night. Sorry if i was obnoxious. I respect your morals and i wouldn't want you to lose your virginity to a drunk girl in your mom's prius.
She grabbed both of our dicks in the pool then said repeatedly, "this is my dream, this is my dream,"
Who the fuck was that guy he kept pulling his dick out walking up to people trying to hand it to people and saying go ahead open the door like it was a door knob
I'm lowering my standards just so I can get laid, but I draw the line when a guy spells cool kewl
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
I wish I cared about making my vagina as presentable as you do.
the best part of college is nobody can tell me not to eat six toaster strudels and jerk off in the shower
Well that's what you get for messing around with her vagina. I told you it was a fickle and insatiable creature.
I should not be allowed to be in possession of a fifth and a phone at the same time.
Do you think my laundromat will notice that the bloodstain on my sheets is in the shape of a face?
Dude!! Who the fuck glued Cheetos to my couch? Bastards!!
Randomize
