I almost didn't recognize her with a shirt on.
I just had someone call me out on a walk of shame via megaphone
I cannot believe how calm you were last night about telling Katie she was on fire.
This show inspires me to have sex in space
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
We had break up sex twice. He said one was cause he had to say goodbye to both tits.
He was standing in the front door with a kareoke machine yelling at the neighbors as the unloaded their van
You. Me. Frosting and a bed. Lets do this.
On a scale of 1 to "bad descision", where does stealing my racist neighbors dog and giving him my roomates dildo for a chew toy rate?
HES DOING PULLUPS BE STILL MY BEATING HEART
I found out Naomi Campbell and I have the same birthday and I feel like that explains so much
smoked four grams out of a bong with a mixture of pool water and white rum. I applaud you for leaving before losing too many brain cells.
idk wtf was in that bud but I was talking to my dead dog last night bro holy shit
You pretended to be Borat in that weird slingshot bathing suit and then proceeded to send another dick pic/nude selfie and said you weren't naked because you were wearing a hat.
Woke up went to work ate beef after three year hiatus shat my pants went to bed
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