i am not above fucking your little sister on your bed
So apparently I told him I was off to go "whore skipping" and I disappeared into the night skipping down the street. I know this because there's video.
you got kicked out last night because right after you said "whats up?" to us, you downed your whole vodka ton and threw it across the bar.
i feel like i want to date him just so i could be besties with his penis
Is it just me or did a policeman park your car last night?
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
This guy just tried to hit on me on facebook. His most recent listed education is middle school. This is my life.
You're an asshole. I don't want your dick as my background. I'll look like I have a thumb fetish.
At least I got to make out with you a little before you proposed.
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
If you kill yourself you won't get to feel that feeling when you have a good shit in the morning. Arent you gonna miss that?
They said you went back in for 30 minutes and were walking with your arms out like an eagle soaring
We almost got stabbed in the nuts last night. Don't worry, we're alright.
THIS IS NOT A LAUGHING MATTER, CAITLIN. MY PARENTS ARE FUCKING. LOUDLY.
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
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