Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am
Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
so either half this theatre is as stoned as me, or day daybreakers is hilarious
I walked into his room and he was naked with a half eaten pecan pie and a bottle of wine.
Having a race with the dryer. Seeing who can get drunk/dry clothes faster.
My cock is literally on the edge of falling off. Fuck Vegas.
we've coined the Sunday morning ritual of taking out our puke-filled trash cans as The Trash Of Shame
She has "Massive Shits" listed as a turn off. That's very specific and there's a story behind it I bet.
Sweet, got a date tomorrow night
Prepare for massive TMI but anyway long story short I have a Swiss flag band-aid across my balls.
What a patriot you are. How'd it happen?
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
I don't know if I'm more excited about sex or that I have an excuse to smoke a cigarette
long story short, the bouquet was used as a sacrificial torch
I currently hiding in an upside down garbage can please come find me
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
Saw a sign that said the chorus of never gonna give you up was enough time to wash your hands. Coronavirus has Rick rolled me.
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