I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
woke up to find a pram in the balcony. first thing we did was look over the edge!
Killed two birds with one stone: found my wallet and unclogged the toilet.
The smiley face on that pregnancy test is so damn taunting. It's like it's laughing at me for my poor choices.
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
i probably shouldve stopped when i uncurled the curly straw in my cocktail because it was slowing me down
It's like you're the one guy who got the "girls have clits" memo.
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
She needs sedatives and a leash
Oh my god, I totally forgot we call your penis "Godzilla's Tail".
Some guy just ordered at Cosmo and 2 screwdrivers in the sky club at 8:30 am. I'm starting to feel a lot better about my alcoholism
I'm not sure why, but my salad smells like a Big Mac. Or maybe that's just the smell of yesterday's, seeping through my skin.
NO HE PUT HIS HAND IN HIS PANTS BEFORE HE TOUCHED THE BONG.
ILLEGAL
one week and then i'm back on the sexual grind. a party is being planned in my vagina's honor
Randomize