windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
Just saw a commercial bout this girl that lost 54 lbs on a taco bell diet. so thats my excuse.
The bouncer said he wanted to but BBQ sauce on my legs. That Mystic tan has already paid for itself.
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
She just hopped out of the car at a red light to pet the baby Jesus in the nativity scene.
Not worth it.
Come on. I'll make you hot pockets. Literally and sexually.
Just ran into a client at a sex shop. The meeting tomorrow is going to be really awkward as we both try not to picture each other using vibrators or role play costumes.
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
He showed up at my front door with Plan B and a rose...
I need a conscience and I need it yesterday.
You know you're gay when you have to have your coworkers explain to you why your bracket is terrible
You can trust me. I'm unemployed and not wearing pants.
I just texted him from the other room to come have sex with me-stress relieved
You are such a millennial
OMG I DIDNT READ THAT TEXT CAREFULLY CAUSE I'M ON THE DEVILS LETTUCE & I THREATENED TO PUNCH A CHILD OMG I'M SO SORRY
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
Randomize
