Flirting with the rich sleazy owner of the club: 1 way ticket to free sushi, drinks, and VIP passes. FUck! im better with older men than i am with babies and dogs
they're mlb prospects.. of course i'm gonna bang one of them.
I'm covered in pickle juice. Why do you people leave me alone?
afterward, he apologized, hugged me, and then gave me a granola bar and said “this is my apology gift.”
In my drunkeness I was planning how to throw up without my parents hearing. I was gonna go for a "run" and just throw up outside.
Let's just say that the best way to get a girls attention is not to slap her on the ass from the window of a moving cab.
He left for work so I drank pickle juice from his fridge
Woohoo! Instead of a pregnancy test you can buy me a burrito
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
We found out if you get Ben high but stay sober yourself he is an AWESOME cook. You need to get your ass down here, this goes against everything I know to be real.
Woke up in a hotel room with some random guy then walked over a mile to the bus stop where I laid down and waited on the bus. GREAT NIGHT
Just puked in a cup. Poured it out the window.
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
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