She actually said during sex "the only thing that would make this more perfect is if we were listening to Lenny Kravitz"
So, obviously, you had to give a fake number this morning.
Yes. Also, we may never be able to go back to that bar again.
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
Dude. I tried to convince her to eat poprocks and give me a blowjob. It did not work out well.
Is all white too much for court to prove my innocents?
Me and Phil are just drawing pictures of thumbs in different costumes during lecture. I love being a senior.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
Can an epipen be used as a tranquilizer ?
It's a "party harder or raise your standards" kind if night.
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
Literally just inhaled three cinnamon rolls. Sara is staring. It was inhuman
There's a girl in class eating a pumpkin pie. Like a whole pie straight from the pan with a fork.
So last night I turned down multiple drinks because "I didn't want to hold them". It's time reevaluate my decisions
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
Never thought I'd say this, but getting head from a skeleton was better than I thought. Happy Halloween
we're tipping the strippers with chocolate coins.
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