Was i wearing a white blazer when you superpoke danced me??
why didn't you poke me back
Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
you used to get mad at me for mentioning 'unprotected sex' and happenings in my bed
well yeah, but then i realized the wisdom of your ways.
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
he said it was like fucking a big sack of slut potatoes
Just because you were able to pour the entire bottle of wine into 2 glasses does not mean you took it easy last night.
I found him in the livingroom trying to soak up broken glass with the clock from the kitchen.
He sent me a picture of his dick with a cowboy hat on it.
He was crying because he hiccuped every time he kissed me. We then crawled to the kitchen because neither of us could stand, and I spoon-fed him peanut butter "to cure his ailment."
I definitely pole-danced a parking meter outside a party last night. The cheering was appreciated.
Talking to friends parents while buying all the things needed for Jell-O shots. classic
Your boobs stole my birthday thunder!
Crust to egg proportion prescribes to a pedantic form of quiche. It's like saying breakfast pizza isn't pizza at all.
He seemed genuinely disappointed when I told him I wasn't going to make out with him to Bring Me To Life by Evanescence so I feel like I've pinpointed the breaking point of this relationship
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