A girl just told me I should smile because I was surrounded by hot girls. I told her that clearly beauty was in the eye of the beholder. And she slapped me!
I'm at a bar that has girls so awful looking even you would not have sex with them.
Well... I doubt that.
Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
I've decided that life's journeys are more fun when your moral compass hangs in front of you and swings with each step
this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
I just passed on expense account drinking, this must be the worst hangover ever.
Go on vacation with her and forget to pack pants. I did that once and it worked like a charm.
We've only been driving for two hours and I'm already down 3 vicodin...I'm not going to survive this family vacation.
If you're trying to piece together your night, I can tell you where those tassels came from.
Just took a piss in some random bushes in a traffic jam and had to sprint back to the car. I'm a boss.
Well she made a 15 year old cry, the grandmother did an ice luge and I woke up to the sound of sex moans
I thought I was bad, the girl next to me on the bench was feeding a bush a hamburger and introduced me. Only at lollapalooza.
Would it be weird if I bought knee pads and shin guards to fuck in my car?
Help. I am eating nachos. But I'm with some guy. I need help. I don't know where I am. The nachos were so good. I'll bring them but help me.
It's a sad day when you're not really phased by the McChicken video only because you've seen weirder porn.
Randomize