he just had his sister send me a message about how he's not a creeper
Was his mother too busy breastfeeding him to do it?
He wouldnt get hard, then started talking about his ex wife. I literally rolled over and started to cry
Had "I should be in prison or dead" storytime at the bar. Found out James has done blow off a dead guy. Overwhelmed and speechless.
He told his ice cream cone it 'looked cute' and then started to cry. The Dairy Queen people were not pleased.
I don't know which is worse, the fact that he can say will you fuck me in so many languages or that I'm turned on because of that
do you think this outfit says "I maintained my dignity this weekend"?
I'm at a bar where I literally walked in to the bathroom and some chick told me to never go to San Joaquin state pen
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
He literally said I should watch game of thrones while I was blowing him like is this the conversation you want to be having right now
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
Last night at the bar you we're seriously going up to people and pushing through them like they were bowling pins and you were a bowling ball
Now all I want to do is stay up, drink wine, and look at dragons.
I found a loose wire in my thermostat. Couldn't find the pliers, so I used a nipple clamp to fix it.
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
Randomize
