Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card?
Beat you to it.
Having dinner with my dad, watching the news and some AIDS prevention ad comes on. My dad then kindly informs me that he doesn't enjoy the feel of condoms.
he walked in on you at the party drunkenly dancing alone on the bed wearing mardi gras beads, sunglasses, and using one ski pole as a microphone.... and you STILL got laid. i dont get your life.
Mattress luging...It's a long story.
knew i was gonna lose at a shoe or be bleeding at some point. and both happened within 20 mins.
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
At one point he was so drunk he was carrying around a bottle of patron drinking out of it and falling everywhere and every time he spilled it he would scream "THERE GOES TWENTY DOLLARS."
I've been randomly kik messaging bearded men I find on Instagram while sitting unshowered in my underpants. I'm like the girl version of a creepy uncle.
The last time I went to Vegas and the sun started to rise, my copilot went home with her nipples pierced.
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
All I remember is grabbing a random guys dick at the bar and him just saying thank you and us taking a shot together
Went to open youtube this morning, and the last search was "ten hours of whale sounds" Best pillow talk ever!
he's annoying when i'm sober but vaguely hot when i'm drunk so yes i do have a preference and it goes by the name of vodka
Flirting with/getting ready to possibly sleep with a married HS classmate and getting added to a bible study group chat within minutes of each other. #Balance
Randomize
