I can't believe you let me try to pierce your nipple with a dart last night
My aunt just said- "pizza is like sex. Even if it ain't good it ain't bad." Obviously she doesn't know us too well.
you threw up in thedumpster behind red robin
and kept yelling "DIRTY BIRD"
There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
I am about to be in my happy place. (the shower with a 6 pack)
When you're on the hood of a car, 10 mph feels pretty fucking fast.
There's a paramedic out here, what have you done?
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
he broke off your car antennae to use as a walking stick before he smoked because he claimed to lack the facial strength needed to open his eyes when he's high
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
fat people need to stop using the handicapped bathroom stall so I can have sex in it. it's common logic
WHY did you say no to the sex seance?
No it's like. I don't respect you. And I think you're a terrible person but. I still wanna bone it out.
IT TOOK ME LIKE AN HOUR TO DO THAT. DO YOU KNOW HOW HARD IT IS FOR ME TO CONCENTRATE ON ONE THING FOR AN ENTIRE HOUR?!
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
Randomize