I googled "I hate my uterus" just to make sure I wasn't the only one.
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
I imagine my 13 hours of sleep after my 3 day upper bender was similar to Jesus rising from the dead.
Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
There are going to be so many Snookis this Halloween that I might just dress as the guy that hit her and punch them all in the face
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
She may be a slut, but at least she's a dedicated slut. She's always super tan and has her shit shaved in really cool designs.
I feel like a food baby is going to burst from my stomach and eat all the leftovers until another food baby rips out of its stomach. And so on. It's truly a merry Christmas.
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
All I know for sure is, I went to bed drunk and I woke up in a relationship..I think I need to reevaluate my drinking skills.
my bed is a shrine, and I am its goddess.
He fucked me while wearing his night time breathing machine mask. Does this mean I joined the dark side and he is Darth Vader?
Had a dream I was doing scat with Caroline. I need to lay off the cheese at night
gonna stay in tonight
and im a platypus. shotgun a beer and get your dick to this party. ive got some hot friends visiting
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