Three words: puerto rican gang bang
do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
I have discovered something important. The trick to making food taste better is not always 'more hot sauce'.
You were so trashed that when you dropped your fruit rollup on the floor, you just sat next to it and cried.
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
I had five suicidal voicemails from him when I woke up this morning. They all started and ended with "DON'T FUCK MY ROOMMATES".
It was only one, it doesn't count.
He skyped me to learn how to roll a joint and for us to masturbate together. And you said a long distance relationship wouldn't work.
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
People shouldn't leave you two alone together. You're just going to end up having sex.
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
I just had to kick out lesbian wedding crashers. They literally wanted to punch me. I threatened to call the cops so they went outside and smoked a joint.
My buddy just got straight up kicked out of the bar on my bday for water boarding people with beer and bar towels
I am eating a king sized snickers in the strip club. Good morning.
Also, we can't be seen together looking suspicious or sexually satisfied
Anal on new furniture sounds like a quickest way to violate a warranty
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