ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
I'm sorry I can't get drinks with you. I have to make sure my dad doesn't go to jail.
Its gonna be a symphony of fucks
Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
He came in 20 minutes late for his final wearing plastic bags on his feet, and a tablecloth cape. Explain.
Yeah kinda weird. My grandparents are here for dinner and I'm chilling on the couch close to tripping out on pain killers. My pap asked me how works going and I prettymuch drooled on myself as an answer.
Scratch one off the douchebag bucket list. Just saw a guy in a sesame street tshirt and a tap out hat. Didn't get the memo that big bird's trying to get into mma.
I tripped over a vacuum cleaner and fell into a beer pyramid
The alcohol just runs so smoothly thru my veins.
If you already knew specifically that I was smoking a bowl in my remodeled bathroom AND THEN still wanted to initiate sexting, please proceed to the altar and marry me this instant.
At my place... I'm gonna be honest though stonewall Jackson is not going to be able to rally the troops. Too many shots of tequila
Liquor doesn't fix sad, but it sure as hell lowers my standards for a rebound.
Drunk you wants to be petty, not you you.
I thought the first time I got peed on it would be by a baby...
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