i can't believe i had my finger in that
I opened my browser to a doctor page titled "serious pain under left side of ribcage". Last night must have been healthy.
Am i fat?
Well i wouldnt let you on top
HE KEEPS WALKING AWAY. IT'S LIKE HE DOESN'T EVEN LIKE FRIES. WTF.
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
He ate me out on the balcony. My asian neighbors cats are judging me...ALL 3 OF THEM!!
Well sundance is in town and Im going to use my one and only shot to bang Taylor swift... Does it count as a random if shes famous?
do you think they make 'sorry for walking in on you drunkenly jacking of to a picture of me' cards?
I made out with a guy because he was sitting on my coat...
Very impressive. My GPA is the same amount of orgasms I can offer tonight (valid only tonight): 3.5
Apparently I still called the officer "sir" despite the fact I was at a .21 BAC. Southern girls are raised right
Serious question: does drunken cyber sex with a stranger on omegle count as cheating???
You gave me a bottle of tequila and introduced me to a ginger named cowboy. I actually love you.
Dude. $3 Jack n Cokes AND Cheesesticks... Find me tomorrow plz
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