Sorry I couldn't answer your call, I'm expecting a call from Chris Hansen.
I'm guessing you didn't end up going to the bar last night.
Nope. Ended up at what I believe was a slumber party down the street.
can you blame him?
i blame him for everything, HE GOT ME PREGNANT
I gambled and lost. Had to pull into a funeral home to clean up with a copy of my resume.
after eating me out, he asked for something to drink. i gave him a glass of water and he said he needed something stronger.
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
I might never shower again without beer.. I might also always drink naked
Just caught my first cougar this fake was worth every fucking penny.
And then I asked the bartender for my third shot and he told me he had to cut me off at two because this was in fact a family fun center
Can I come over? I respect you, but I want disrespectful things to happen
YOUR DICK HAS BEEN IN ME I DO NOT WANT TO BE SET UP TO MEET YOUR FRIENDS
You kept sacrificing me last night. You would just yell out "Virgin Sacrifice!!" and then throw me into a circle of men.
You owe me beer. On another note, I made out with the ups guy at work today ....
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
It's like a donut of clothes around a pair of heels. Like they were transported to another dimension naked.
Randomize
