she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
i don't remember her name, but i don't need it unless we decide to hook up again. but even then, i can get away with not knowing it for a while. it's not like we have actual conversations.
this homeless guy just told me to make a wish on his magic plastic spoon but said to be careful what i wish for...
Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
I drank almost a whole fifth last night. Woke up with blood everywhere wearing a "stereotype this" tshirt. How fitting
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
You threw a hot dog at his face...I wouldn't call you either.
when i tried to put the condom on he started screaming about how he didn't want his groceries bagged
Yes I want to fuck your friends but it's out of respect and love for you.
It's like split custody, only he's not a kid and they have sex with him.
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
didn't realize her mom was home while we were fucking, but she's oddly okay with it. she made us food afterwards. but then kept talking about having grand kids the whole time. is it time to bail?
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
finals do horrible things to a person. i haven't worn pants since friday
Wanna guess where my charger was last night.....in my cooler with my beer. I put it in there because I knew I would never forget my beer.
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