What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
i almost got kicked out of the rave because i was trying to get in on some couple's makeout sessions
this is a time for prayers...seriously
let us hold hands and pray.. sweet baby jesus please bring us some sweet sweet man loving this homecoming weekend to aid our lonely vaginas it has been a long couple of weeks amen.
Apparently, I kept going on about how i'm going to name my first born Ramen. I think this is a good parenting move.
You were so excited to be getting 4 tickets to the Whale Rodeo.... That high
ive cried into many a lonely burritos..
Just got our of the shower. I'm standing naked in front of my open windows cause fuck my neighbors that's why
you said "how could you not want to hook up with me when I have these abs" and then proceeded to rip your shirt off in the middle of the bar. I'm pretty sure you were hammered.
JESUS
On the plus side, I know I'm allergic to latex now. Like really fucking allergic
Like who turns down taking a nap inside of someone in 2014.
I would also like you to tell your human bio class that I successfully smoked out the flu. 103 degree when I woke up yesterday. 100degree after one bowl. 4 more bowls and 16 hours later all that's left is a cough
Found this cake smashed up inside a box on the sidewalk. Im saying yes to adventure and eating some.
Taking a nap. Sidewalk cake kicked my ass. It had boston creme filling!
Did April legit get married in a parking lot?
I just don’t understand what sort of USPS worker wants to take my unitard and sex toys.
Is it wrong for me to wish my cat had arms to get me a beer?
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