i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
you kept lifting my skirt up, yelling "PANTY PARTY". needless to say, you're at the top of my father's shit list right now.
They were so loud I wrote them a sex critique and taped it to his door.
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
I just peed behind the dumpster and dedicated it to you. Can i call u?
the last call horn was blaring when I tried peeling you off the bathroom floor than you uttered "Ill take the toothless one.'
I need moral support for this bender
Wake up. We're going shopping for booze and samurai swords.
You screamed "There's a potato in my anus" and proceeded to attempt to grind with the bouncer. Also, I'm pretty sure our Chem teacher was in the same bar as us.
In other news I may have fractured my masturbating arm
At least it wasn't your drinking arm
We got stuck in traffic in the tunnel while we were smoking weed. We were afraid to air out the car.
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
You grabbed my dick don't call me son
I just showered and shaved both ankles and one knee because that's the skin that's exposed in the jeans I'm wearing today. Please tell me I'm not the only one who does that.
Randomize
